The statement "think like a man, act like a woman" has often been misconstrued and adopted by many. However, attempting to do this could lead to disconnect from one's authentic self, leading to an unnecessary identity crisis. Understanding each other doesn't mean thinking like each other, rather it means cherishing our differences and appreciating individual gifts.
Many resort to drugs and alcohol as a way of evading reality, a means to justify certain behaviors or decisions. For instance, when confronted with a challenging situation like losing a job, some people drown their sorrows in alcohol instead of confronting and dealing with the issue.
A similar evasion of reality could be the belief that you can "think like a man". This thought may provide a temporary solace and justification for the absence of a partner in your life. But trying to think like a man to attract one would be as futile as hunting your prey by becoming like them—it simply doesn't work.
Reflecting upon a well-known story may help unravel the concept better. Consider the biblical tale of creation. God created man, named Adam, in His own image. Adam's task was to tend the land, cultivate it. Understanding man's motivation, God created Eve from Adam's rib as a unique and powerful reason for Adam to strive and thrive.
In this narrative, Eve was created to motivate Adam, not the other way around. Despite originating from the same body, they were not given the same mind. The story illustrates that men and women were not designed to think alike—if we thought like each other, we'd be each other.
Contrary to popular belief, understanding each other is not about mastering the mindset of the opposite gender by reading a book or adopting their thought process. Such attempts might even prove detrimental, turning a man into a perceived threat if his actions are used against him.
The moral of this tale lies in cherishing our individuality and not forcing ourselves to think or act the same. It reinforces the adage, "ignorance is bliss". For instance, a successful businessperson doesn't need to know everything—they just need to hire someone who does. We need to appreciate each other for our unique gifts and invest our most valuable asset—time—in understanding and loving one another.
Remember: "I appreciate everyone, everything, and every event, whether seen or unseen, that led to me being me at every stage of me." - Swagger Coxch
Every relationship is a contract—a lease of love and commitment between two parties. However, like any contract, if one party isn't fulfilling their part or there's a miscommunication, it's time to rewrite the terms and "Re-Lease Love".
Sounds like we're spinning a love fairytale? Let's discuss money to illustrate this concept of Re-Lease Love.
The world often believes that wealth only accompanies the corrupt or the exceptionally lucky—a lease signed between society and an erroneous belief. This contract essentially states: if I'm not wealthy, I'm not crooked or overly fortunate. It's time to revoke that lease!
Why? Because it's baseless—you're neither crooked nor excessively lucky just because you desire to be financially stable. It's time to re-negotiate the terms with your beliefs and sign a new lease—one that empowers and uplifts you.
Imagine a couple who decide not to dine out often. Yet, at every opportunity, one of them suggests hitting their favorite restaurant. This inconsistency hints at a breached agreement—an opportunity to Re-Lease Love. Perhaps one of them assumed 'not often' meant 'not every weekend', while the other took it as 'never'. To restore harmony, they need to re-clarify and re-agree on the terms of their pact.
In a previous post, we highlighted that men release sexual energy through fights, while women receive it. Arguments serve a purpose—they're pressure valves for men and fillers for women's emotional reservoir. They're opportunities to Re-Lease Love and reach an emotional equilibrium. However, an argument without making up afterwards, in whatever form resonates with the couple, is akin to using a public restroom—you get temporary relief but not complete satisfaction.
The golden key to effectively Re-Lease Love? Absolute accountability. Understand your actions, the reasons behind your words, the triggers for your fights. When you take 100% responsibility, you can predict and possibly prevent recurring arguments. You unclasp your emotional nozzle, allowing love to flow freely. She removes the brick from her emotional bucket, becoming receptive to your love.
Does cupid ever strike in a hookup situation? It's as rare as a blue moon, and here's why.
When you're set up by a friend or stumble upon an attractive profile on a dating site, what you see is a polished representation—engaging, impressive, and tantalizing. And you know what we call it? The Hookup Dilemma.
Let me give you a sneak peek into my playboy past, not to brag, but to make a point. There was this lady I knew—let's call her Miss X. No romantic emotions between us, but I had a buddy who loved to mingle just like me. One day, playing the ultimate wingman, I introduced the idea of him to her, painting a picture of a man with quirks and qualities I knew would fascinate her.
Buckle up, because this is where we dive deep into the heart of the Hookup Dilemma.
When I introduced my friend to Miss X, I did it with a tantalizing twist—I painted his flaws as virtues. Yes, he was an ass, but according to my narrative, that was just a façade hiding his sensitive side.
Miss X fell head over heels for this image of him, feeding off the potential she thought she saw. She forgave his arrogance, reasoning that it was just a defense mechanism guarding his feelings. She treated him like a long-term partner, pampering him with gifts and acts of service.
The real culprit behind the Hookup Dilemma is the breaking of the Bar of Equality. In our story, I unknowingly distorted this balance. By presenting an inflated image of my friend, I artificially raised the expectations, paving the way for her to fall in love with a potential that was far from reality.
The truth, but twisted in a deceptive frame—that's what I call "true lies". In the illusion of knowing him better, she was robbed of the chance to make an informed decision about his real personality.
This isn't just about one anecdote from my past. The same pattern is echoed in online dating sites and friends' hookups everywhere.